StarLink-IRC has made available some items (mugs, t-shirts, sweatshirts, hats) with our logo hrough cafepress.com at http://www.cafeshops.com/slirc Cafepress handles all sales, production, shipping, and warranty. StarLink-IRC gets no money from sales of these items. (All prices and shipping costs are set by cafepress without any additions by StarLink-IRC)

Email Updates: All channel owners: If you happen to change ISP's change of email address please let someone in #Channels know. If for any reason cservice needs to get in touch with you about your channel, we need a valid email address. You can let cservice know by sending an email to slirc-register@starlink-irc.org

Word Games:  Live trivia at various times and places throughout the week.

#International: We hope to bring together folks from all nations and languages .. come join us for chat, good friends, and if you can volunteer to translate, all the better. Even a smattering of another language is welcomed!

WWW (Way With Words): Have you tried to come up with the perfect verse, greeting or message when sending a card, and your mind draws a blank? If you have some favorites, send them to Pat@pobox.com

DISCLAIMER - Web sites identified here may contain executable files (software). Be advised that StarLink-IRC has no knowledge of the suitability or effects such softare may have on your system. We advise everyone to make a carefully informed decision prior to running any new software.

February

• February 20 Lois's Birthday (#oldradio & #rebels)
• 22 George Washington's birthday
• 22 Amazing's birthday (#mIRC & Cservice)

March

• March 1 NOLady and gngrbrd's wedding
• 3 RickB's birthda
• 5 NOLady's birthday
• 5 g-force's birthday
• 8 Sharkie's birthday (#veterans & #Norwich)
• 13 Fitzie's birthday (#65plus)
• 14 chiefy's birthday(IRC Op)
• 17 St. Patrick's birthday (Take a leprechaun to lunch)
• 18 - 28 National Engineer's Week

(Personal message: I knew a "model-type female) who called that little green man a Leopard Kong - ed.)

Pisces people are generally very unrealistic and their self-image is blurred. Thus, most posts by Pisces people stink, even though they thought everyone would shower them with congratulatory emails.

(Note: NOT the opinion of Ye Editor)

Famous Pisceans: Kelsey Grammer ("Frasier"); Ann Sheridan, born 1915; Wolfman Jack, born 1938.

AMAZING AND LESSER THINGS! by Amazing

No special news this issue.

A short column of made-up facts and non-information brought to you by your friendly neighborhood arachnid

FOGWEB FOLLIES

This month is dedicated to the survival tips and handy hints provided by the US gov't. Please do not try this at home. Don't try it anywhere. Matter of fact, forget you even read it here.

ONE of the SLIRC brain trust (who is anonymous but has initials of Ameret) suggests that you solve multiple problems at once. Why seal up a safe room when you have to go pee? Sooooo.... Seal up the bathroom. Get lots of those little cans of air for cleaning keyboards! See?

PLUS ! .. you can run the tub for an hour or so, which will put about 5 feet of water in your newly sealed up bathroom. (Handy hint.. not recommended for apartment dwellers. Thats about 12 tons of water which probably will allow you to go visit your downstairs neighbor.)

SO there you have it. What to do with terror Alert Status Mauve !

And they say you dont learn anything in chat rooms! HAH !

Ad: IMI* is also offering FREE duck tape. Its a bit yukky since if you smoosh a duck into tape the goopy parts stick to the sides. Huh? oh. ducT tape. Sorry. n/m

* IMI - Itsy Megaindustries Inc - Our Motto - If it's a quality product, you didn't get it here!"

PS -- Terrorism is something to fret about, but lets face it, our government is NOT being the most helpful about what to do these days. This means YOU all of the nice people with 8000 cases of aquafina in the basement.

NEW CHANNELS New Stars Linked by Treecat .. A warm welcome to this month's new channels and their owners. If you have a chance, do stop in and give these folks a friendly Hi!

• ##DEAFWORLD - JaguarXKE
• #Kuwait - easy^goin
• #fhl - YoungBlood
• #NaturalLaw - Aquinas
• #Hobbit_Family_And_Friends - RainHobbit
• #humanspirit - dax-
• #30+Fun - chattie
• #CatholicForum - Cathman

Other Random but Fun Events: #WTGO (All sorts of stuffs) #Just4Fun (OUTBURST); #Sunshine_Again ( MADGABS)

In Sympathy for the familes of the crew STS 107  Columbia  Spaceship broke up on the way home Saturday February 1st 2003 9:00am EST 40 miles above Dallas at 12,000 mph. 15 minutes from landing. There were no survivors.

Remember when our grandparents, great-grandparents, and such stated that they only had an 8th grade education? Well, check this out. Could any of us have passed the 8th grade in 1895? ( Look Closely... that's EIGHTEEN ninety five ! ) This is the eighth-grade final exam from 1895 in Salina, KS, USA. It was taken from the original document on file at the Smokey Valley Genealogical Society and Library in Salina, KS, and reprinted by the Salina Journal.

1. Give nine rules for the use of Capital Letters.
2. Name the Parts of Speech and define those that have no Modifications.
3. Define Verse, Stanza and Paragraph.
4. What are the Principal Parts of a verb? Give Principal Parts of lie, play and run.
5. Define Case, Illustrate each Case. 6. What is Punctuation? Give rules for principal marks of Punctuation.
7 - 10. Write a composition of about 150 words and show therein that you understand the practical use of the rules of grammar.

1. Name and define the Fundamental Rules of Arithmetic.
2. A wagon box is 2 ft. deep, 10 feet long, and 3 ft. wide. How many bushels of wheat will it hold?
3. If a load of wheat weighs 3942 lbs., what is it worth at 50cts/bushel, deducting 1050 lbs. for tare?
4. District No. 33 has a valuation of $35,000. What is the necessary levy to carry on a school seven months at $50 per month, and have $104 for incidentals?
5. Find cost of 6720 lbs. coal at $6.00 per ton.
6. Find the interest of $512.60 for 8 months and 18 days at 7 percent.
7. What is the cost of 40 boards 12 inches wide and 16 ft. long at $20 per metre?
8. Find bank discount on $300 for 90 days (no grace) at 10 percent.
9. What is the cost of a square farm at $15 per acre, the distance around which is 640 rods?
10. Write a Bank Check, a Promissory Note, and a Receipt.

1. Give the epochs into which U.S. History is divided.
2. Give an account of the discovery of America by Columbus.
3. Relate the causes and results of the Revolutionary War.
4. Show the territorial growth of the United States.
5. Tell what you can of the history of Kansas.
6. Describe three of the most prominent battles of the Rebellion.
7. Who were the following: Morse, Whitney, Fulton, Bell, Lincoln, Penn, and Howe?
8. Name events connected with the following dates: 1607, 1620, 1800, 1849, 1865.

1. What is meant by the following: Alphabet, phonetic, orthography, etymology, syllabication?
2. What are elementary sounds? How classified?
3. What are the following, and give examples of each: Trigraph, subvocals, diphthong, cognate letters, linguals?
4. Give four substitutes for caret 'u.'
5. Give two rules for spelling words with final 'e.' Name two exceptions under each rule. 6. Give two uses of silent letters in spelling. Illustrate each.
7. Define the following prefixes and use in connection with a word: bi, dis, mis, pre, semi, post, non, inter, mono, sup.
8. Mark diacritically and divide into syllables the following, and name the sign that indicates the sound: card, ball, mercy, sir, odd, cell, rise, blood, fare, last.
9. Use the following correctly in sentences: cite, site, sight, fane, fain, feign, vane, vain, vein, raze, raise, rays.
10. Write 10 words frequently mispronounced and indicate pronunciation by use of diacritical marks and by syllabication.

1. What is climate? Upon what does climate depend?
2. How do you account for the extremes of climate in Kansas?
3. Of what use are rivers? Of what use is the ocean?
4. Describe the mountains of North America.
5. Name and describe the following: Monrovia, Odessa, Denver, Manitoba, Hecla, Yukon, St. Helena, Juan Fernandez, Aspinwall and Orinoco.
6. Name and locate the principal trade centers of the U.S..
7. Name all the republics of Europe and give the capital of each.
8. Why is the Atlantic Coast colder than the Pacific in the same latitude?
9. Describe the process by which the water of the ocean returns to the sources of rivers.
10. Describe the movements of the earth. Give the inclination of the earth.

An architect goes to Hell where the devil says: "Hey we don't get many architects around here. There's some work I want you to do for me."

Within a short time, the architect gets an air-conditioning system installed, puts in elevators and escalators, repaints the place and in general makes it quite attractive.

God hears of this and calls the devil on his cell phone. "Hey, what's going on down there?" God asks Satan

"Amazing!" says Satan, "We got an architect and he put in Air Conditioning, escalators and escalators, even repainted the place - it looks beautiful down here."

"An architect? You don't get the architects; I do!" said the almighty, "All the architects are up here. How do you think we keep this place looking like it does? That architect was a mistake. Send him back!"

"No," said the devil, "I will not send him back. We've got him and we're going to keep him!"

"No you won't," God responded, "I'll sue you!"

"Oh yeah," said Satan, "Where are you going to get a lawyer?"

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctor worry about them. That is why you pay him/her.
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. " An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the Devil's name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. augh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you > can improve, get help.
9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

ANNIVERSARY
To my grandma and grandpa -
I know why you're so good at being married...
You've been practicing for a long time!
Happy Anniversary!
-

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